Paul Palmer, proud to be a pisces man

Being women is more than about maternity. As men are visual animals that they have many erotic fantasies in their mind, the woman in his life can make at least one of these dreams come true that will really make him on his knees before you. Just like the cherry on the top of ice cream, erotic lingerie can also be the spice of your love life.

By putting on your most provocative lingerie, you can elicit just about the right mood to set the bedroom ablaze. It is right the time to flaunt your best assets with the sexiest bit of erotic lingerie.

Everything from the color, materials, and the cut of her erotic lingerie can speak of her sexual fantasies. What she chose to wear will let your know how she see herself. And the lingerie will reveal her deeper personality. It is sure that some piece of sexy lingerie would reveal how she thinks about her sexy attraction. Here are some tips to choose the best erotic lingerie for your much-anticipated night.

Satin, silk and lace would be always the first choice. They will add more glamour to your passionate lovemaking due to their soft touch and feminine appearance. Maybe these fabrics are pricier but they are really worthwhile.

The gorgeous bust line should be always accentuated by choosing the push-up and padded bras. According to female anatomy, the bust line catches the most attention. Therefore, sexy lingerie should always concentrate on the perfect bust line.

Choose some see-through cover-up to get him want more. Some fine, sheer fabrics like lace that draped and skimmed around your body will create sexier silhouette.

The last but not the least, size does matter a lot. Hot, ultra-sexy bra is pointless if it does not fit your body at all. Regardless of the size of your bust, the perfect-sized bra will make you appear more alluring as the perfect-fitting bra can spells confidence in all corners.

When it comes to shopping for your best erotic lingerie, some details like ribbons, ruffles and lace also should be paid attention. And by shopping these seductive patterns online, you can avoid a lot of embarrassment in regular shopping in lingerie outlets. Also you have a wide range of selection out there.

alice

Being women is more than about maternity. As men are visual animals that they have many erotic fantasies in their mind, the woman in his life can make at least one of these dreams come true that will really make him on his knees before you. Just like the cherry on the top of ice cream, erotic lingerie can also be the spice of your love life.

By putting on your most provocative lingerie, you can elicit just about the right mood to set the bedroom ablaze. It is right the time to flaunt your best assets with the sexiest bit of erotic lingerie.

Everything from the color, materials, and the cut of her erotic lingerie can speak of her sexual fantasies. What she chose to wear will let your know how she see herself. And the lingerie will reveal her deeper personality. It is sure that some piece of sexy lingerie would reveal how she thinks about her sexy attraction. Here are some tips to choose the best erotic lingerie for your much-anticipated night.

Satin, silk and lace would be always the first choice. They will add more glamour to your passionate lovemaking due to their soft touch and feminine appearance. Maybe these fabrics are pricier but they are really worthwhile.

The gorgeous bust line should be always accentuated by choosing the push-up and padded bras. According to female anatomy, the bust line catches the most attention. Therefore, sexy lingerie should always concentrate on the perfect bust line.

Choose some see-through cover-up to get him want more. Some fine, sheer fabrics like lace that draped and skimmed around your body will create sexier silhouette.

The last but not the least, size does matter a lot. Hot, ultra-sexy bra is pointless if it does not fit your body at all. Regardless of the size of your bust, the perfect-sized bra will make you appear more alluring as the perfect-fitting bra can spells confidence in all corners.

When it comes to shopping for your best erotic lingerie, some details like ribbons, ruffles and lace also should be paid attention. And by shopping these seductive patterns online, you can avoid a lot of embarrassment in regular shopping in lingerie outlets. Also you have a wide range of selection out there.

alice

A brief overview of the main newspapers, news sites and TV channels shows that, despite the fact it’s been a month since the US election, “Obamania” is still in full swing. Obama has become something of a popular culture icon, on the par of Madonna, Batman and rock stars. It has then occurred to me that Obama’s image and story can be compared to Joseph Campbell’s myth of the Hero, which Campbell called the “monomyth” (1). Whether consciously or unconsciously, people – and sometimes Obama himself – tend to project this image upon him. As early as 2006, he was called star and legend (2), and recently I have even read an online blog where the writer called him ‘savior’! (3) Mind you, I’m not laying a claim of profound originality on this –  I discovered then that George Lucas has already made note of Obama following the Hero’s Journey (4) and there are two bloggers that talked about it, albeit sketchily (5, 6). However, I would like to look at this more in detail than the others I have read – and this article will be lengthier than most others!

Let’s start with the beginning. For those that don’t know, Joseph Campbell (1904-1987) was one of the foremost mythologists of his age (7). He is primarily remembered for his groundbreaking book, The Hero with a Thousand Faces. It is in this one that he articulated the myth of the hero’s journey, which directly influenced George Lucas’ Star Wars, Disney’s The Lion King, and countless movies and books ever since (8). The book ‘deconstructs’ the journey of the hero in three parts. It is my intention here to compare these with the story of Obama’s rise to power and Presidency.

Preliminary:

As per Campbell’s analysis, the hero is someone naturally special, singled out in some manner amongst his peers. Born of an African father and white mother, Obama’s mixed heritage has marked him out as a ‘special’ person right from the start. Furthermore, a characteristic of the Campbellian hero is that he is often cast aside by his family as in the story of Moses. This is an archetype Obama fits very well: he was abandoned, only two years old, by his Kenyan father Barack Obama Sr, whom he met only once more in his lifetime. This has had a major impact on him, according to his best-selling autobiography Dreams from My Father (9).

Part I: Departure

1. The Call to Adventure: the hero receives a beacon call, often from another person (called a ‘herald’)
Obama describes a moment of self-awakening in his book Dreams from My Father, when he realizes, following one-year work with a corporate firm, that his calling was to work for the poor (10).

2. Refusal of the Call – sometimes, the hero initially refuses the call for action.
This is an optional element in Campbell’s book that does not apply to Obama, who comes across as a positive and ambitious person.

3. Supernatural Aid – the hero is helped by a protective figure that gives him support
In youth, Obama’s main support seem to have been his mother, Stanley Ann Durnham, and his grandfather Stanley Durnham, who acted as a surrogate father (11). In politics, an important figure was Illinois State Senator Emil Jones, the leader of the Democrats. His wife, whom Obama has called his ‘rock’ also had an important influence on his political career. 

4. The Crossing of the First Threshold – the hero must pass a first test to enter into the new world of heroic action
There were some key decisive moments in Obama’s life that shaped his future career as a politician. One was his decision after two years of attending Occidental College in California to transfer to Columbia University, where he graduated in political science. Another, to seek a low-paid job as a community organizer in Chicago. Thirdly, his decision after two years of working in Chicago to go to Harvard Law School.

5. The Belly of the Whale – the hero must pass through an initiatory trial that involves a descent into a dark or dangerous realm
In Dreams of My Father, Obama presented his darkest moments as the heavy consumption of drugs and alcohol both at  Punahou high school and at the Occidental College. Obama confessed to becoming a “pothead” in order to “push questions of who I was out of my mind” (12). Eventually, however, he got his life in order by moving from Occidental College to Columbia University.

Part II: Initiation

1. Road of Trials – succession of obstacles
Barack Obama has encountered a number of obstacles that he has surpassed in political ascendancy. The first was the candidature for the Illinois State Senate in 1996, when he had to eliminate better titled candidates. He succeeded, albeit using what some critics said as being unfair tactics – he successfully challenged the voting campaign of both candidates who were hence legally suspended from the contest (13).
The second obstacle was his failed candidacy to US House of Representatives in 2000, when he was defeated by incumbent Bobby Rush by two to one. This was a sore defeat, the only time when he considered giving up politics altogether (14). He didn’t, and Obama learned many useful aspects of campaigning from this attempt.
In 2004, he successfully run his candidacy for US Senate. Finally, in 2007, he obtained the endorsement of the Democrats for Presidency against the better titled Hillary Clinton.

2. The Meeting with the Goddess –  marriage between the hero and a queenlike or mother-like figure
In 1988, Obama met Michelle Robinson, a fellow Harvard Law graduate,  while he was doing a summer internship at law firm Sidley Austin. He married her in 1992. Obama is deeply admirative of his wife, whom he called “his rock”. He speaks of her, “There’s something about her that projects such honesty and strength. It’s what makes her such an unbelievable professional, and partner, and mother, and wife” (15).

3. Woman as the Temptress – rejection of a powerful female figure
A read of Obama’s life shows that he seems to respect or even admire female figures. First was his mother Stanley Ann; then there was Michelle Obama. Finally there were other political mentors like Alice Palmer (16). If there was one woman whom Obama had to ‘reject’ it was Hillary Clinton, his Democrat counter-candidate for Presidency. Nevertheless, Obama did not seem to harbor bad feelings toward Hillary, neither did she act in a ‘corruptive’ sort of manner toward Obama.

4. Atonement with the Father – reconciliation with the tyrant and merciful aspects of a father-like authority figure
As Dreams of My Father shows, Obama was affected by the absence of his father, Barack Obama Sr (17). An important part of young Obama’s life was taken by his effort to reconcile his father’s absence with his ever-present racial heritage.

5. Apotheosis – the hero’s expansion of the self, or profound alteration of the perception of reality
Obama’s first apotheosis was his famed 2004 speech at the Democratic National Convention, that would bring him into the spotlight and change the course of his career. Obama’s final apotheosis was his candidacy and success to the bid for the Democratic nomination in 2007.

6. Ultimate Boon – the hero obtains a key item or victory
His first major victory was his landslide win in the US Senate in 2004; next, his Democratic nomination in 2007 and finally, his election as President in 2008.

Part III: Return

1. Refusal of the Return – having attained enlightenment or bliss, the hero may not want to return to the ordinary world
This is not the case in Obama’s case, since his victory was attained in the ‘ordinary’ world, not some otherwordly or mythical land. Furthermore, he has always been an ambitious figure, who would not settle in one place but aim higher (18), (19).

2. Magic Flight – the hero may have to wrestle the ‘boon’
Obama had to pull all his stops in the Democratic presidential nomination of 2007, which had to be wrestled from much better-titled Hillary Clinton.

3. Rescue from Without – the hero may need supernatural support to bring the boon into the ordinary world
There were several moments when Obama’s ‘lucky streak’ played in.  It isn’t a coincidence that Washington Post, in an article from August 2007, called his ascent to US Senate as “A Series of Fortunate Events” (20). They recorded how in 2004 his win for US Senate was helped by the decision of Peter Fitzgerald, the incumbent Senator, not to run for his own seat again, by the domestic abuse charges brought against Democrat counter candidate Blair Hull, who was the favorite for the seat just one month before the election and by Republican counter candidate Jack Ryan’s domestic sex scandal. Obama eventually came in to win the Senate seat by a landslide victory: 70% (21).

4. Crossing the Return Threshold – the hero returns to the ordinary world
The ‘return threshold’ is undoubtedly the win of the American Presidency, which was both a challenge and a given – following his win of the Democrat nomination over Hillary Clinton.

5. Master of the Two Worlds – the hero pertains both the divine and human worlds
Following his political ascendancy and experience, Obama is now seen as fit to run the USA and able to share his vision to the American people.

6. Freedom to Live – the hero bestows the boon to his fellows.
Once he has won the Presidency, Obama is now in the position of contributing to the betterment of American life and of improving America’s tarnished image abroad.

Conclusions: Barack Obama’s story and image fits quite well with Campbell’s “Hero’s Journey” pattern, even if it does not flow in a linear fashion as Campbell designed it. This is, after all, natural: Campbell was disecting single-story fairy tales and books, but Obama is real-life figure and his life goes beyond the imaginary. 

On the other hand, one aspect worth noting is that Campbell’s pattern does not go beyond point 6 where the hero is in the position of bestowing the ‘boon’ to the other people. Obama must go beyond the Campbellian heroic journey into the actual work of sharing the boon. Currently, Obama is a hero because of his past, and the symbol of change, youth and racial unity that he symbolizes. However,  it is his long-run work that will define him as a true hero.

References:

(1) Campbell, J. (1949). The Hero with a Thousand Faces. New York: Pantheon Books.
(6) Cocca, C. (2008). Barack Obama and the Hero’s Journey. Online. Available at: http://christophercocca.wordpress.com/2008/11/08/barack-obama-and-the-heros-journey/. Accessed on 11 Nov 2008.
(3) Edinger, R. (2008). Obama Rocks: America and the Planet. Online. Available at: http://www.obamabook.org/obama_book_introduction.html. Accessed on 09 Nov 2008.
(2) Graff, G. (2006). The Legend of Barack Obama. The Washingtonian, 1 Nov. Available at: http://www.washingtonian.com/articles/people/1836.html. Accessed on 09 Nov 2008.
(11) Jones, T. (2004). Barack Obama: Mother Not Just a Girl from Kansas. Chicago Herald Tribune, 27 Mar. Online. Available at: http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/politics/obama/chi-0703270151mar27-archive,0,2623808.story?page=1. Accessed on 09 Nov 2008.
(9), (10), (12), (17) Obama, B. (2004). Dreams from My Father. New York: Three Rivers Press.
(5) Snapp, M. (2008). Obama Walks the Hero’s Journey… Contra Costa Times. Online. Available at: http://obamamessiah.blogspot.com/2008/03/obama-walks-heros-journey.html. Accessed on 09 Nov 2008. ]
(4) The Huffington Post. (2008). George Lucas on Obama: A Hero in the Making. Online. Available at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/06/04/george-lucas-on-obama-a-h_n_105102.html/ Accessed on 09 Nov 2008.
(7), (8) Wikipedia. (2008). Joseph Campbell. Online. Available at:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Campbell . Accessed on 10 Nov 2008.
(13), (16)  Jackson, D & Long, R. (2007). Barack Obama: Showing His Bare Knuckles. Chicago Herald Tribune, 4 Apr. Online. Available at: www.chicagotribune.com/news/politics/obama/chi-0704030881apr04-archive,0,5507395.story. Accessed on 09 Nov 2008.
(14), (20), (21) Mundy, L. (2007). A Series of Fortunate Events. Washington Post, 12 Aug. Online. Available at: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/08/08/AR… Accessed on 10 Nov 2008.
(15)  Parsons, C., Japsen, B. & Secter, B. Barack’s Rock: Michelle Obama. (2007). Chicago Herald Tribune, 22 Apr. Online. Available at: http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/politics/obama/chi-070422michelle-story-archive,0,56722.story?page=1 . Accessed on 09 Nov 2008.
(18) Pearson, R. & Long, R. (2007)Barack Obama: Careful Steps, Looking Ahead. Chicago Herald Tribune, 3 May. Available at: www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/chi-0705030101may03-archive,0,2521558.story . Accessed on 10 Nov 2008.
(19) Dorning, M. & Parsons, C. (2007). Carefully Crafting the Barack Obama Brand. Chicago Herald Tribune, 12 Jun. Online. Available at:www.chicagotribune.com/news/politics/obama/chi-obama_senate_recordjun12-archive,0,3195588.story . Accessed on 10 Nov. 2008.

Jo Hedesan

Its a well documented fact that when relationships lose their spice and spontaneity, things can go from bad to worse quite rapidly.

In most cases, when that initial spark is lost from a relationship, it results in the sex life of the relationship diminishing and thus the partners may seek to find what they once had in other places!

Although this is a bad time, don’t stress too badly, there are many ways to recreate that spark that has been lost. One way to do so is in the form of “dirty talk” in the bedroom. Many people are very interested in dirty talk however they are too scared to take the plunge into actually doing so.

Another common fear is that they are unsure what to say in this context, however, what you say is irrelevant most of the time!

Let me explain that a bit better, the content of what you say during sex is irrelevant, its all about delivery and communication. Remember back to a time where you’ve been attracted to a guy and you’ve changed the tone in your voice and the way you speak as a way to appear cute, and attract him to you. You may not have even realised you were doing it, but I’m sure he wasn’t focusing on what you said!

This example explains just how easy it is to use this to your advantage. You don’t have to be a lyrical genius to make it work.

These are just a couple of things you can use to your advantage to ensure your relationship doesn’t suffer. Dirty talk can keep the sex life spicy and spontaneous and there are many ways to use these methods.

P Jackson

Have you ever heard people saying that they’re planning on taking a holiday in the Caribbean, but then unsure as to where in the region they’re going? It’s a common dilemma – the Caribbean is a great draw to tourists, with its 10 hours a day of sunshine and pristine beaches, but actually picking which island is right for you can be tricky. It would take more space than I have here to write a guide to each of the islands, so I’ve decided to list a handful of family Caribbean holiday suggestions to give you an idea of what to expect from this beautiful and relaxed area of the globe:

Barbados Sports Camp

If you’re planning on taking a family Caribbean holiday in August, then the free Barbados Sports Camp is a must for your children – allowing you to enjoy the sun and the sand in peace! Families may book up to four children between the ages of 9 and 17 for 1 to 5 days at the camp, where up to 100 children can get tuition from former professional players of Netball, Football and Cricket. Dividing the kids up by age group, and with the emphasis placed squarely on fun, this year’s coaches included Alan Hanson, Mark Bright, David Seaman, Sir Geoff Hurst, Mike Gatting, Olivia Murphy and Fiona Murtagh. With that pedigree of coaching it’s sure to not only be fun, but educational as well!

Explore Revolutionary Havana

The infamous Cuban revolution is still felt in every aspect of Cuba, from the attitude of the locals, to the propaganda and the statues. No more is this felt than in Havana, where Castro delivered many a memorable (if very long!) speech, and where there’s a monument to the failed revolutionary hero of the 19th century – Jose Marti. The Plaza de la Revolution is the place to go to get a feel for the vibe, where the iconic picture of Che Guevara is a truly imposing presence. Aside from that, the various museums of the city have all kinds of artefacts and items pertaining for the time, allowing even non-islanders to get into the revolutionary spirit on a Caribbean holiday!

Stay in an Antigua Spa Hotel

Antigua has some of the best spa hotels in the world, so if decadent relaxation is something you look for from a Caribbean holiday, then look no further. Amongst the more memorable options are being worked on by two therapists with a ‘Synchronised Massage’ at Carlisle Bay, or enjoying a Caviar and Pearl Facial at The Verandah Resort & Spa. The perfect way to unwind after a ‘hard’ day at the beach!

See the Grizzly Side of Jamaican History

Jamaica is widely known as a land of sand, sea and good times. However, if you want to see the grizzly side of the island’s history, not only can you visit the site of the last pirate execution, you can also dare to take the tour of Rose Hall – the former home of the infamous Annie Palmer. Immortalised by the late Johnnie Cash in song form, the legend of her life is different from every source, but the general gist involves a background in Voodoo, the murder of 3 husbands and relationships followed by the murder of many of the slaves on the building’s plantation. She was then herself murdered as an act of revenge. The reason why the house is still a highlight for luxury Caribbean holiday makers? Because many visitors report that the building is haunted by her from beyond the grave, despite the tomb she’s buried in being designed to keep her there for ever. Visitors report voices, bloodstains, footsteps, music and babies crying upon visiting the house, and many more see things in the photographs that they don’t recall seeing at the time!

Go Diving with Sharks in the Bahamas

In 1877, Mark Twain commented “You go to heaven if you want, I’d rather stay here” in his first visit to the Bahamas. It certainly is that beautiful, and the experience is no less pleasant over 100 years later! If you want something a little more challenging, then Shark Diving is something that many will see as closer to Hell than Heaven… Still for those who can stomach it and aren’t put off by the warning instructions (“never move your arms away from your body!”), there’s some fantastic photo opportunities, and of course a memory and anecdote that will last long after your Caribbean holiday is over!

Of course, in addition to this there is plenty of cross over – all the islands have splendid beaches, all of them offer conditions ideal for scuba diving and all of them have their fair share of nightlife for the visitors. Whatever you’re looking for, you’re sure to find it on a family Caribbean holiday – whichever island you end up visiting.

Kieron Sellens

Being women is more than about maternity. As men are visual animals that they have many erotic fantasies in their mind, the woman in his life can make at least one of these dreams come true that will really make him on his knees before you. Just like the cherry on the top of ice cream, erotic lingerie can also be the spice of your love life.

By putting on your most provocative lingerie, you can elicit just about the right mood to set the bedroom ablaze. It is right the time to flaunt your best assets with the sexiest bit of erotic lingerie.

Everything from the color, materials, and the cut of her erotic lingerie can speak of her sexual fantasies. What she chose to wear will let your know how she see herself. And the lingerie will reveal her deeper personality. It is sure that some piece of sexy lingerie would reveal how she thinks about her sexy attraction. Here are some tips to choose the best erotic lingerie for your much-anticipated night.

Satin, silk and lace would be always the first choice. They will add more glamour to your passionate lovemaking due to their soft touch and feminine appearance. Maybe these fabrics are pricier but they are really worthwhile.

The gorgeous bust line should be always accentuated by choosing the push-up and padded bras. According to female anatomy, the bust line catches the most attention. Therefore, sexy lingerie should always concentrate on the perfect bust line.

Choose some see-through cover-up to get him want more. Some fine, sheer fabrics like lace that draped and skimmed around your body will create sexier silhouette.

The last but not the least, size does matter a lot. Hot, ultra-sexy bra is pointless if it does not fit your body at all. Regardless of the size of your bust, the perfect-sized bra will make you appear more alluring as the perfect-fitting bra can spells confidence in all corners.

When it comes to shopping for your best erotic lingerie, some details like ribbons, ruffles and lace also should be paid attention. And by shopping these seductive patterns online, you can avoid a lot of embarrassment in regular shopping in lingerie outlets. Also you have a wide range of selection out there.

alice

Being women is more than about maternity. As men are visual animals that they have many erotic fantasies in their mind, the woman in his life can make at least one of these dreams come true that will really make him on his knees before you. Just like the cherry on the top of ice cream, erotic lingerie can also be the spice of your love life.

By putting on your most provocative lingerie, you can elicit just about the right mood to set the bedroom ablaze. It is right the time to flaunt your best assets with the sexiest bit of erotic lingerie.

Everything from the color, materials, and the cut of her erotic lingerie can speak of her sexual fantasies. What she chose to wear will let your know how she see herself. And the lingerie will reveal her deeper personality. It is sure that some piece of sexy lingerie would reveal how she thinks about her sexy attraction. Here are some tips to choose the best erotic lingerie for your much-anticipated night.

Satin, silk and lace would be always the first choice. They will add more glamour to your passionate lovemaking due to their soft touch and feminine appearance. Maybe these fabrics are pricier but they are really worthwhile.

The gorgeous bust line should be always accentuated by choosing the push-up and padded bras. According to female anatomy, the bust line catches the most attention. Therefore, sexy lingerie should always concentrate on the perfect bust line.

Choose some see-through cover-up to get him want more. Some fine, sheer fabrics like lace that draped and skimmed around your body will create sexier silhouette.

The last but not the least, size does matter a lot. Hot, ultra-sexy bra is pointless if it does not fit your body at all. Regardless of the size of your bust, the perfect-sized bra will make you appear more alluring as the perfect-fitting bra can spells confidence in all corners.

When it comes to shopping for your best erotic lingerie, some details like ribbons, ruffles and lace also should be paid attention. And by shopping these seductive patterns online, you can avoid a lot of embarrassment in regular shopping in lingerie outlets. Also you have a wide range of selection out there.

alice

Crisis and Opportunity”
When you find yourself navigating your way through a crisis, what can you do to come out on the other side, stronger for the experience?
Every crisis involves risk. By definition, a crisis is fraught with danger, but also an opportunity for tremendous learning and growth. Crisis is a time of testing, but it’s also a time of renewal. Many people, when faced with a crisis, tell themselves that they have failed and convince themselves that there’s no point in trying any longer.
For example, if a young woman tries to become a professional singer and fails, it doesn’t mean she’s a failure as a person or that her life is a failure. It simply means that, at this particular time in her life, her attempts at singing for a living are not working out. There are many other possible choices she can make, including trying again at some point in the future. She hasn’t failed, and she doesn’t have to give up her dream. But she does have to learn from this attempt and, perhaps, rethink her strategy.
Is there another way she can go about it? Does she need more education? More experience? More exposure? Help promoting her career? Failure is only failure if you let it cause you to quit. If you choose to let it help you, it becomes information you can learn from.
It is in meeting each crisis with determination that we measure up to life and its challenges. In so doing, we develop tenacity and greater inner strength.

Technorati Tags: crisis and opportunity, critical change, success tomorrow

Are you planning to make a change in yourself? If you are, I would like to share some tips on how to go about getting the best results.

Maybe you want to lose weight, get into good physical shape, or quit smoking. Maybe you’d like to learn to do something new, or do something you already do better. Maybe you want to work on your anger, like we talked about yesterday. Whatever it is you want to do, there are three things we now know about self-directed change that can help you.

First, set goals that aren’t too big, too difficult, or too distant. Your long-term goal may be to lose 50 pounds by next summer, but a better goal might be to lose 5 to 10 this month. Next, carefully monitor yourself so you always know how you’re doing. Record your weight daily. Keep track of everything you eat and what you do to burn calories. Like my consultant friends keep saying, “What gets measured, gets done.”

By the way, don’t waste energy beating yourself up when you slip or fail. It turns out the kind of feedback that works is the kind that emphasizes what you are doing right, not how you blew it.

Finally, reward yourself for reaching minor goals and give yourself meaningful incentives to keep going. Short-term goals, careful monitoring, and rewards and incentives are three things that help you to change.

I would add one more thing, and it may be the most important of all: believe in your ability to achieve your goal. If you don’t believe you can lose five pounds in 30 days, you won’t put much energy into trying. So go ahead now make the change.

Paul Palmer

Personal development is the key to success

Technorati Tags: paul palmer, personal development, self directed change

The family is the main place where we develop our self-esteem. It can also be a place where self-esteem withers. I intentionally act in a way that builds self esteem when family palmer get together, letting my kids help me makes them feel good. I can see the benefits in their attitudes and behaviour.

Virginia Satir was a family therapist who influenced and touched people all over the world. She was a pioneer in the study of self-esteem, and had this to say about families: “Feelings of worth flourish in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.”

But if you grew up in a family where one or both parents were abusive, where there were unresolved mental health problems, or where alcohol or drugs were an issue, you know that family life can be very different from this description. In fact, it can be downright damaging.

Perhaps, now it’s time for you to take on a parenting role, and maybe you’re wondering if you can break the cycle. Or maybe you’ve been a parent for a while and realize you could be doing a better job of it. Whatever your situation, you’ll benefit from taking an honest look at your strengths and limitations.

You see, when you acknowledge and accept the past, reach out for new understanding (as you’re doing now), and then decide you’d like to raise your kids in a better way, you are breaking the cycle. And you are building your own self-esteem – the first step in helping your own kids to do well.

Paul Palmer

My wife and I split up some time ago, the boys no longer accept her abusive behaviour when they see here. I resisted breaking up the family palmer for four years now I wish it had happened years earlier.

Technorati Tags: Family and Self-Esteem, family palmer, paul palmer